Leaders Must Loathe Incivility
I try to stay away from religion and politics at this blog, but I’m going to give you my two cents worth on the Rush Limbaugh controversy because I think it speaks to leadership. As you probably know by now, last week Mr. Limbaugh made some very disparaging remarks about a Georgetown law student named Sandra Fluke. He called her a slut and a prostitute on his radio show. Mr. Limbaugh has apologized but many of his corporate sponsors have withdrawn their support for his show.
Ms. Fluke testified before the U.S. Congress about insurance coverage for contraceptive drugs. People have religious views about contraception and political views about health insurance. Both Ms. Fluke and Mr. Limbaugh have legitimate but different perspectives on these issues. Reasonable people should be able to engage others in issue-focused conversation about the merits of their positions without the use of derogatory rhetoric.
Corporations are organizations of people. Leaders of corporations approve corporate sponsorship of individuals on all sides of the political and religious spectrum. I like that because it supports a marketplace of differing ideas. If we don’t like the views of someone that a corporation supports, then we are free to choose to spend our money with the company’s competition. One clear goal of corporate sponsorship is to sell more products and services, so corporate leaders continually evaluate the costs and benefits of everyone they support.
As a service provider, Mr. Limbaugh has to assume full responsibility for his choices and the consequences of his behavior. But Mr. Limbaugh is also seen by many as a thought leader in his “industry” and the standards of conduct for those we call leaders simply must be higher. The most important issue here is not Mr. Limbaugh’s integrity but our own leadership integrity.
Mr. Limbaugh’s incivility toward Ms. Fluke was totally unacceptable. Even if I agreed with his views, I’d choose not to listen to him because of the way he conducts himself. It’s more a matter of my character than of his. As Bob Sutton says “Avoid pompous jerks whenever possible. They not only make you feel bad about yourself, chances are you will eventually start acting like them.”
Leaders, guard your mind because it is the gateway to your heart. If you allow yourself to love incivility in any form, then eventually you will begin to speak and act the same way. Lend your ear to those who speak what you believe to be true in ways that respect the basic dignity of those who happen to disagree. Civility is a personal and corporate virtue we need to honor and reward.
What do you think? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below!
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About the Author: Bret L. Simmons
Welcome to my blog! Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section of my posts. I publish all constructive, non-anonymous comments. 
Hi Bret ~ Civility is a big thing for me. I believe that when one is civil even (or perhaps especially) in disagreement, it allows doors to remain open for further exploration and learning. As soon as incivility makes its entrance, doors slam shut, as do rational thinking, compassion and interest in getting to any kind of understanding.
Thanks for an interesting and timely post.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 5th, 2012 at 11:24 pm
Totally agree, Gwen. Leader simply must take a stand and set the example for civility. Thanks for sharing! Bret
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Thank you Bret. I’ve been reading a lot about this since last week. In all that I’ve read, yours is the most eloquent commentary and really hits the nail on the head. This isn’t about politics, it’s about a moral responsibility to NOT sit idly by while the public discourse degenerates into a conversation between attention grabbers instead of leaders. Thank you for being a leader and speaking out.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 6th, 2012 at 9:51 am
I could care less about politics, Vicki, but when incivility gets this much attention I think we are right to call it a leadership and not a political issue. Thanks for sharing! Bret
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I couldn’t say it any better than you did:
“Leaders, guard your mind because it is the gateway to your heart. If you allow yourself to love incivility in any form, then eventually you will begin to speak and act the same way.”
An important warning and reminder to us all.
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Vicki Bischoff Reply:
March 6th, 2012 at 1:58 am
I do LOVE that quote! Thank you.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 6th, 2012 at 9:51 am
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jesse!
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Good points, Bret. Just wondering where you were – and everyone else — when Bill Maher called Sarah Palin a “t–t” and a “c–t” to great rounds of applause. Same concept, but in Maher’s case, even more offensive language. What was the response? Nothing but the sound of crickets – and certainly no apology. Incivility can occur on all sides and we need to call it out wherever we find it.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 6th, 2012 at 9:54 am
I’m not a political animal, Mary Beth, so I try to tune out all the garbage from both sides. I did not even hear about the Limbaugh thing until a few days after it happened, but the vile in his comments troubled me. If it makes you feel any better, I think Bill Maher is an idiot. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Bret
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Bret,
The Sleeping Giant of civility awoke and hit “the most uncivil one” right in the pocketbook (one form of pain he does seem to understand).
How does civility work its way into the “ditto heads” group (learned incivility)? How does it work into the other direction, politicians?
Maybe we have gotten to a point, not just in public discourse but corporate too, where individuals must teach leaders civility?
I think we have seen a little of that teaching this last week. Many eloquent posts, like yours,
well done.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 6th, 2012 at 9:56 am
I think leaders must see the importance of this issue, and if they don’t offer corporate training on it, they certainly should address it in a code of ethics and model it themselves. Thanks for sharing! Bret
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Here’s the best sentence from your well-written, calm piece: “It’s more a matter of my character than of his.” Yes, and I think the people he stokes up begin to agree with him, and act like him, which accounts for a lot of the incivility we have today.
My objection was with the second part of his hate speech–that we are all entitled to videos of contraceptive users having sex—it’s not civil, logical, funny, or, I hope, sponsor-able.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 7th, 2012 at 1:29 pm
Welcome, Quinn. I tried to constrain my comments to the leadership lesson we should all take away from this. I have no interest in political arguments, which can never be an excuse for bad behavior. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Bret
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Bret, a much better teaching moment on Incivility is to use all the vile comments coming out of Bill Maher about all female conservatives and more recently his very personal attacks on Rick Santorum”s children.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 12th, 2012 at 10:36 pm
Welcome, Steve. I never listen to Bill Maher. I loathe the incivility on all sides. Thanks for sharing! Bret
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The idea of “respectful civility” must feel like a lost art. The work place is looking more and more like a NY street during rush hour!
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 26th, 2012 at 9:28 pm
Welcome, Michael. For whatever reason, some folks have to set up win/lose situations. Hard to get through to those types… Thanks for sharing! Bret
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Bret, this is such an insightful comment and I believe really gets to the heart of what had caused the degradation of our public discourse. The “Win at all costs” mentality that doesn’t work for a long term, sustainable solution to anything creates only losers in the long run; be it a profitable business (Exon, Lehman Brothers, etc.), successful athletes (steroid use), or politicians and entertainers who have thrived and then failed by this motto. Regardless of your support of the end goal, all responsible Americans will find that the long term health of our country will be better served if we critically analyze the means, regardless of the ends. Thank you for opening up a very valuable discussion.
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Bret L. Simmons Reply:
March 26th, 2012 at 10:57 pm
I see win at all costs in the workplace and it bothers me. Thanks for sharing! Bret
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